Financial Problems In Marriage Avoiding Divorce: How To Deal With Financial Stress In A Marriage - Financial Issues In Marriage

When the economy gets tough, most of us start worrying about more about money. We might take on more responsibilities at work or start working longer hours. Sometimes we might even take on a second job just to bring financial security back to the marriage. The emphasis is on the money. But is that where it should be in a happy marriage?

The answer is no. Too often, concerns about money dominate even the best relationships and overshadows what should be an even more important aspect of the marriage: the sexual aspect.

Good Sex = A Happy Marriage

While comedians may joke about the limited sex lives of married people, they usually are more active in the bedroom than single people. That's a good thing because sex provides a whole host of benefits for us and many of these benefits are essential if you want to save your marriage.

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Even the simple act of cuddling provides us with a feeling of intimacy that can wash away stress, worries, and tension. Sexual intercourse can take that intimate feeling even further. If you and your partner are feeling overwhelmed about your financial situation, the best way to relax is a quick romp in the bedroom while the kids are gone. You'll be amazed at how relaxed you feel afterward and how much stronger your marriage will be if you repeat this process often.

Marriage Problems in the Bedroom

If you are already having problems in the bedroom, possibly because of a lack of communication, then you may not reap these same rewards. But that's an even better reason to start working on correcting those intimacy issues. Learn how to tell each other what you want in the bedroom and have an open mind. Don't let your pre-conceived notions of what is "acceptable" in the bedroom limit the fun the two of you can have together. After all, if you can't get a little wild in the bedroom with your husband or wife, who can you get wild with?

Of course, if you're having some difficulties letting go or if you're feeling so overwhelmed by stress that sex is the furthest thing from your mind, you need to read How to Have a Good Marriage in a Bad Economy the information it contains will be able to help you improve your marriage and your intimacy in many ways.

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With the rise in divorce cases these days and the fast paced and modern lifestyles that provide challenges to couples, some people have developed a fear of getting married. Or those already married fear not being able to make their relationships last for a long time.

But this should not be the case. If you value your marriage and you want to make it stable throughout your lifetime, you have the ability to do it. You can do it. Just commit to what you want to achieve and persevere, you will have every chance to keep your marriage for eternity.

You should also get to know the factors that contribute to a lasting and stable marriage. Experts point out that in order for a marriage to succeed, people need to be broad minded, mature and be free from all kinds of prejudices.

Marrying somebody from your own cultural background or ethnic group can be an advantage. You share the same religion, likes and dislikes and can understand each other better than being with someone from another group.

But while it's been found that those who belong to the same cultural group or background have a greater chance of enjoying a stable relationship, it should not be misunderstood that they should marry only the person from the same race. There have been many mixed marriages around the world in recent years and some have survived.

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Recognizing and accepting mistakes is another factor that helps in keeping a marriage intact. Did you know that by simply doing this, you can already solve half of your problem? So why not try to develop the attitude of accepting what you may have done wrong and apologizing for it. It will take off the stress in you and will give you your peace of mind.

If you're the one who got hurt, you should also learn to forgive and accept your partner's apology. Instead of retaliating and finding fault from your spouse, it is much better to keep quiet and just say sorry. It won't help fighting back as it could only make your conflict bigger.

The financial aspect of life should not be taken for granted as well. Oftentimes, money is the cause of a couple's conflicts particularly when there's a lack of it. But it is not safe to say as well that only the rich can have a lasting marriage because couples who know how to live within their means can also make their relationships last long.

What matters is you don't give in to temptations. It's a reality that businesses that manufacture and sell products will always advertise their offerings but if you know what you need and not buy items that are unnecessary in your daily living, you can save money and enjoy the life your deserve moving forward.

Finally, a strong support system is necessary for couples to surpass their trials in life. This means having a family and friends you can turn to for advice when you find it hard to deal with your issues. Those with a support system they can rely on during tough times can be sure to recover easily from their marital woes.

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Among the vast variety of reasons why a marriage breaks down is broken trust. A marriage that may have been starting off as something beautiful can completely come shattering down if one partner out of the couple does something to violate the other's trust or had even been contemplating doing so. Even the smallest of incidents can cause the trust that existed between the two to break down and this can be the biggest reason for mis-communication that can eventually lead to a complete breakdown of marriage.

Solve marriage problems such as broken trust only through communication. This is the easiest and the best way to get over this kind of a problem if you still want to save your marriage. Even though your marriage is hanging on its hinges towards a divorce it doesn't mean that it will end with a divorce. You have to work with your partner to stop this as well as you can.

If you are the cause for the breakdown of trust then it has to be your responsibility to solve marriage problems such as these. You have to convince your spouse in whatever way possible that you are willing to work on the problem and that you do not want the marriage to break down. If you are still willing to work on your marriage, it probably means that whatever you did to break the trust of your spouse, you had a definite reason to do so. So try and make your spouse see your point of the situation and convince them that it was a mistake and a wrong decision.

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We've all heard the childhood chirp that goes--"First comes love, then comes marriage..." Most people can even recall where they were when they first heard it, and who they were with. Most likely the other kids chimed in with the singy-songy little ditty when they imagined us a bit too close to a member of the opposite sex in second grade. Kids are very good at using their radar to embarrass each other, and of course oblivious to the realities of marriage. We adults may very well rearrange the chant to say "First comes love, then comes--a civil contract?" Not so romantic heard that way, but a lot closer to reality nonetheless.

Civil marriage is a legal construct, thus the law gives it efficacy and influence in our society. Many people mention the traditional aspect of marriage, but the simple fact is that marriage itself has continually evolved over time, bending and contouring itself to the needs of people who partook of its myriad benefits and protections.

And the law hasn't always been particularly benevolent to the parties involved. Only a few decades ago a traditional part of marriage was a codicil called coverture. From the French word for 'covered', coverture defined two people in marriage as one unit, the primary member of which was the man. Under coverture women were not allowed to own property, receive money for themselves, or pursue an education against the wishes of their husbands. Of course the law has since been altered to remove such a blatant piece of discrimination.

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Hundreds of years ago marriage was solely the means to an end, that being the solidification of property claims. This was true largely of the landed gentry, as the marriage of peasantry was little more than the ritualistic 'jumping the broom' identified in certain other cultures. The lower classes had no property, so marriage for them was a matter of convenience and necessity. Common law marriage was a routine status in this country in the early part of the 19th, and into the 20th century, for the simple reason that judges were few and far between, and people needed to settle in and have children for help on their farms. Waiting for legal purveyors of civil marriage, or any other civil affair to make the rounds was a luxury.

Even farther back in history, in the early years of the Catholic Church, marriage was regarded as a strictly legal affair, along the same lines as recently relevant Roman laws. The church didn't recognize marriage as a sacrament for nearly 700 years. Tradition has always had a way of bending and twisting to suit our needs, and that will continue. Indeed, marriage itself has always been an evolving institution, largely because of changes in the law pertaining to it.

This is one reason that marriage benefits anyone entering into it; there are legal protections for nearly every aspect of civil marriage, including all the following, a list that is by no means definitive: Assumption of spouse's pension; automatic inheritance; automatic housing lease transfer; bereavement leave, or indeed any provision under the Family Medical Leave Act; burial determination; certain property rights; child custody; crime victim's recovery benefits; divorce protections; domestic violence protection; exemption from property tax on partner's death; immunity from testifying against a spouse, and on and on, all provisions in direct reference to legalities.

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Indeed, our society has recognized that marriage is so central to stability and harmony that it's hard to overestimate its value.

And here, ironically, is one of the fundamental legal benefits of civil marriage: Divorce. That's right. Without marriage there can be no divorce. This seems painfully obvious, but the implication is not as clear as it may seem. Being a legal entity, civil marriage provides protections. It is a contract between two people and the state in which they marry. And, as we know all too well, many marriages end in divorce. The stated legal protections are much more critical at that time than at the onset of a civil marriage. Without marriage, the 'divorce' proceeding must be conducted without protection of any kind for one or both parties. Thus the dilemma: if no civil marriage--how to provide protections to citizens, when a relationship involving property, or even children ends?

Marriage is immersed in facts that are rarely discussed, and which always present a somewhat different reality than at first assumed. First comes love, then come--the lawyers!

Saying or doing the wrong thing can actually cause your spouse to feel even more distant from you. You can make your spouse fall back in love with you, all over again.

You don't have to worry about whether your spouse is on the brink of asking you for a divorce. You can control the situation and use specific techniques to naturally make them fall hopelessly in love with you.

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