My Husband Blames Me For His Actions: My Husband Blames Me For His Behavior

Blaming others can become an ugly habit. It negatively effects all our relationships. Stop and think about these quetions for a moment:

- How often do you look for someone to blame when something goes wrong in your life? Most of the time?

- Does your spouse get the brunt of your blame game?

- Do you often blame others for things that are totally insignificant?

I use to blame my husband a whole lot. Honestly, much of the time it was to make myself feel better (so I discovered later). If I could make him mad, I found some satisfaction in that. I'm certainly not proud that I did this, but it is very freeing to have confessed it, been granted forgiveness and now be able to discuss it openly.

Taking my frustrations out on my husband was so wrong. I have a great husband and, even in the days when our marriage had it's hardships, he never deserved the heat I gave him. What I found was insecurities inside me as to why I needed to blame someone else in order to make myself feel better. As long as I allowed these insecurities to be a driving force, I was always going to be looking for someone to blame.

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Taking responsibility for who I am, what I say and what I do is a much better life. God helped me to see the insecurities that I allowed to rule what I said, did and who I blamed in those days. His mercy and grace brought out the authentic me. I am forever grateful. My relationships with my family, friends and even people in passing improved exponentially.

If you can relate to this article, please know that life does not have to be this way and that you haven't done anything that can't be repaired. It's true. There is nothing that you and the Lord cannot handle.

If you have found yourself in a place of blaming others, here are steps to repair the damage:

1. Begin with prayer asking that God would forgive you and give you the courage to make things right.

2. Pray again asking that God would provide the exact right timing and give you the exact right words to make things right.

3. When the timing is provided, speak with the other person - admit your mistake(s) and make amends. Do this with no expectations attached. This is about you owning up to what you have done and making it right; period.

The other person may accept your apology or they may not. The point is for you to do the right thing. Making amends is usually a very humbling and very maturing experience.

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How do you make sure that your marriage works after the honeymoon period? How do you make sure that you maintain the same level of excitement you had in the beginning of the relationship? There are certain things you have to do in order to make the relationship work for you and at the same time understand that you will have to put in the effort into the marriage. I have four tips here to help you save your marriage and make it work.

The first tip is to make sure that you continue to do the small things you used to do before the marriage. Say small things like you look lovely, make dinner together or maybe send a nice text during the day to let your partner know that you thinking about them. You could also tell them how lucky you are to have them in your life and what a blessing it is to have to share a life together. If you can take the first step, after a while your partner will see the efforts and in turn do the same.

The second tip is to use kindness and love to save your marriage. Yes, it is normal to have disagreement and sometimes you might not like the way you have been talked to. Maybe you seem to have anger at anything that happens around. There is no need to take it out on your partner. When you feel like you will burst out, it is safe for you to take a deep breath and give yourself sometime to cool off.

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The third tip is to have a listening ear. What I mean here is for example when your partner gets home, gave them the attention that they need. You could ask how work and their day had been. You will need to just listen and give them your time. A nice warm hug would go a long way. You could also run a bath for them or prepare their favourite meal. Just the small things matter here.

The last tip is to treat your partner the way you would want to be treated. Take time to ask yourself how you would like your partner to treat you and take the same step to make sure that you put your heart and care into the relationship. One thing you have to remember is that everything takes time and the more you do it, it will become a habit for you and in the end will require no effort.

You have to live your life with love and kindness including your marriage and it will come back to you.

Even if both spouses love each other sincerely, at times they might find themselves getting more and more distant from each other and getting close to a divorce. But like me, you too can take some steps into saving your marriage and turning it into a satisfying relationship.

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It is normal for married couples to start feeling a little bored after years of being married. Infatuation normally passes or fades as the couple starts to face the responsibilities of building a home and raising children. As you spend each day with your spouse, you learn little things about him or her that you might find annoying or even start to resent. The level of intimacy might be decreased as the two of you live each day in the same routine.

Save your marriage from total collapse by spending exclusive time for your partner. If you have just suffered heartbreak after finding out that your spouse carried an affair, it would also be a good idea to go on a retreat. Plan a getaway if you think that your marriage is getting cold, or your sex life is getting stale, or that appreciation is no longer extended, or simply because of boredom.

There are various reasons why you should need to save a marriage as stated above. Going on a retreat with your spouse is a good way to try and repair betrayed trust, reopen communication lines, or simply forge stronger bonds and communicate. Boredom, which brings about feelings of alienation and the lack of affection could be resolved if you and your partner spend some time away.

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If you are seriously considering getting a divorce after years of boredom, you owe it to your partner and your children to try and save your marriage before calling it quits. Divorce should be your last resort. If you are going on retreat to save a marriage, plan it ahead of schedule. Beach resorts or anywhere close to nature would offer a good atmosphere to talk things out with your spouse. Choose someplace serene and peaceful. You could even go back to where you spent your honeymoon to revive memories of your young love.

If you are recovering from an affair-stricken marriage, you and your partner need a quiet place to talk alone. You will be surprised to find out that both of you will be more reasonable if you talk somewhere far away from home.

A retreat is simply a good way to spend some quality time with your partner. You could try out doing things the two of you have not done before. Sing to your spouse, give each other massages, make love as if you were newlyweds, or just hold each other tight. You might even learn new things about your husband or wife that you did not know despite years of being together. It would work best of both of you are willing to save your marriage.

A romantic getaway is a good opportunity to assess yourself as a partner as well. Reflect on your ideals as to what a good spouse should be and weigh whether you are coming up to your own standards. In your retreat, take the time to apologize to your partner for your shortcomings and make it sincere. If you have been hurt, do not expect to be able to forgive right away. But going on a retreat is a good way to start assessing whether your partner deserves a second chance.

Couples can love one another and yet find themselves drifting apart and headed for a divorce. There are steps you can take, with or without the aid of your spouse to get your marriage back into the loving place it once was.

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It's bad enough when a relationship fails, but when your marriage seems to be over, it is simply devastating. The years of hard work that you and your spouse have put into the marriage cannot simply be thrown away. Those times of crises that you managed to get through together will never be forgotten.

When you think of everything you and your spouse have been through - the good and the bad, it seems such a pity to simply accept it when your marriage seems to be over, and just throw in the towel. Just as it was very hard work to get to where you and your spouse got to over the years, so is it going to be just as hard to try to save your marriage.

You and your spouse worked through everything together up until now. You faced all the problems head on together, dealt with them and fixed them together. It is no different when your marriage seems to be over. This is another huge problem that you have to face and try to solve together, just like before.

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Obviously, when you and your spouse faced a crisis before, you would sit down and discuss the best way to deal with it, right? So do precisely the same thing now, and there is a good chance that you will get through it, just like before. Also, you and your spouse probably experienced an extreme sense of satisfaction when you DID solve your problems before - solve the one you have now, and you will experience that same sense of satisfaction.

When your marriage seems to be over it is essential that you treat it just like any other problem and deal with it in much the same way. Sit down, discuss the problem or problems that you and your spouse have, and then talk about what you are going to do to solve them.

It does not mean that when your marriage seems to be over, that you and your spouse deal with the problem separately. On the contrary, now more than ever, is it essential that you work together to solve your problems - after all, it is more than likely both of you who caused the situation you are in.

Now Listen Carefully-

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Author's Bio: 

50% of people divorce. Do not be another statistic. You Can Save Your Marriage These powerful techniques will allow you to trust again and ignite the fire and passion back into your relationship. Save Your marriage today! Click Here

Divorce does not have to be your only option. Even if it feels as though your relationship can't be saved because of the ongoing conflicts between you and your spouse, it can be. There are techniques that you can begin using today that will not only stop a divorce, but will help also you build a stronger and more loving marriage.

Do you have a unique situation? Discuss your marriage problems on our forum. We can help you find a great loving relationship! Go to: RelationshipTalkForum.com