There is something universal to how we with PTSD react to abuse.
Having experienced a trauma or two we may think trying is of no use.

What is it that makes a miserably, mistreated woman ultimately stay?
Her conviction to a religious conscience may be a heavy reason in play.

The thing about that is there is justice in rules that need to be broken.
Do not be pulled back by getting advice on this, afraid of words being spoken.

After all we have been through, an outlet of release is nothing to fear!
Divorcing one’s abuser is not that easy a task, and that is perfectly clear.

For me the difficult matter was exposed, and shared with a Priest in a retreat.
His advice, and the counselors there through prayer made the decision complete.

That was the most testing step towards taking the first step to change my life.
A changed mind was needed in allowing myself to be released from being a wife.

It was 23 years of marriage, plus four years before that we were together.
The fact that the abuse came in between those years made it harder to weather.

An outsider of the opposite sex may have doubted there was a crime.
After all, there were no witnesses or hints of hatred at any particular time.

This became a silent frustration that festered daily taking away all hope.
Leaving would mean letting go of a life half-lived where the mind said, “Nope.”

Change has to be thought of such implemented to work, you know.
We have to hold onto a power beyond our own for this to truly grow.

Nothing that has happened to us was in vein, just meant to fulfill our life plan.
Experiencing terror that repeats itself could not be from God, you say, but man.

This is where a leap of faith is needed to understand the journey to our ending.
We survived, and endured long enough to allow the heart’s mending.

Having this kind of mental, emotional resolution does not come over night.
Every aspect of our lives was damaged in some way from our PTSD fright.

Some of us will not survive the journey, and that causes me to be very sad.
Given that I did survive, and continue now to thrive makes me quite glad!

There is a greater strength within me that can be poured out, and shared, too.
Life’s gifts are appreciated even more than holding onto what makes us blue.

Through contemplation, meditation, and clearing of my organs this was done.
Qigong energy practice is how blockages were removed, so healing begun.

All those old feelings of hating him, and myself created energy-type mildew.
Having thick heart-walls created protection for the organ trauma went through.

The problem was that new relationships could not break up the damage.
Such negativity attracted more pain that caused sorrow when kept on edge.

The ability to change came after my own trials’ time of incubation was complete.
God had to fix me up to clear my channels so that in life I could, again compete!

Author's Bio: 

Do you want to know more about Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD?) Contact me and I will share from my own twice-healed experiences. I am also a Qigong and Reiki Practitioner doing Poetry Workshops. Family, friends, and those with PTSD find me at: See my books on Amazon at: Namaste!